Draco never expected taking a relationship to the next level could bring so much trouble. Who expects wearing each other’s clothes to be an obstacle anyway? He still can’t find it in himself to object to Ron’s wishes when he uses that gruff voice of his.
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cockblock (vulgar, slang)
verb: to impede the romantic or sexual advances of a person (usually a man) towards another
cockblockhead (vulgar, slang)
noun: a person (usually a man) who unintentionally cockblocks themselves
see also entries for: self-sabotage, absolute idiocy, Harry James Potter
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Hogwarts has been bitten by the lust-bug, and Draco Malfoy appears to be the only one immune. Unfortunately for him, he has no idea what’s going on! So, his arch-nemesis decides to help him out…
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Draco finds an ickle wounded birdy in the forest…
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Lucius throws a fit, Harry tries to remain calm, and Draco doesn’t much care. Honestly, what were Albus and Scorpius thinking?
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Draco wants Scorpius to stay innocent forever and does not at all appreciate the threat that that wretched Albus Potter presents, so maybe it’s time they had a chat…
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In a world where scent doesn’t really play that much of a role except sometimes between mated pairs, a lot of people tend to base their assumptions of who’s what secondary gender by their body shape and behaviour. Omegas are seen as small and delicate, while alphas are bigger and more stereotypically masculine, with betas falling somewhere in between.
Thus, everybody (or almost everybody) thinks that Gabriel is the omega in his and Dean’s relationship. And while it’s true that he does on occasion like taking it rather than giving it in bed, he has a knot to rival the tallest, most macho alpha around, and his and Dean’s… exploratory sex life often leaves them in situations where it’s really fucking difficult to hide who’s got the bigger hard-on in their pants versus who’s leaking slick into theirs.
Even so, it’s only when Dean gets pregnant that most people realise that the guy they thought was textbook alpha is the exact opposite behind closed doors.
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Ron tells how he wound up working for the Death Eaters. Then Lucius asks Ron for a favour, and life takes a turn for the truly bizarre. (I normally hate first-person POV stories, but this tale requires Ron’s relentless humour. Trick or Treat, Mr Death Eater.)
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If there’s one thing every Slytherin loves, it’s a good game. Too Hot was played at every party Slytherin House had hosted for years, and Draco had won every round since the first time he played. Pride in his title as Champion was to be expected. Stating it like a challenge in front of the returning Eighth-Year Gryffindors? Not Draco’s brightest move, to be sure.
Combine the challenge with mistletoe, feminine wiles and secret plots, Ron Weasley’s temper, and an unexpected connection with a Dragonologist and Draco’s Christmas just got a whole lot more complicated!
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For example, one of them read: “Old people can’t drive very well.” If that wasn’t a universal truth, Draco didn’t know what was. Even if he had only the vaguest ideas of what ‘driving’ meant. He had already decided on rewriting it into: “Age is sometimes a boon, sometimes a hindrance.” That would come off pretty good. Unfortunately, he had no idea what to make out of lines such as “Penguins are pretty”.
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pacifiers-and-paraphilia
